If you read any other blogs, especially of other women bloggers who are preggo, then you've likely seen (or a variation of) this post before. It's a fun way to over-share details of your pregnancy. I took the liberty to edit it down to ten questions, and kept the answers as honest and real as possible.
Now, I'm EXTREMELY excited about becoming a mommy. I CANNOT WAIT to hold this little dude in my arms! And there are moments of pregnancy that are indeed pretty awe-inspiring, like feeling the first movements, seeing the baby on the ultrasound for the first time, and simply knowing that your body is just doing this, without you having to think about it - it's just GROWING a human. Whoasies.
BUT LET ME BE PERFECTLY CLEAR, dear readers: I absolutely, positively, cannot stand being pregnant! It is an evil that must be endured for a fantastic end result. It's been a relief to bond with other mama's who feel the same why I do and understand that you don't have to love the means to love the end. And pregnancy is a mean means, know what I mean?
So, in the spirit of full disclosure, read on to be amused by my serious discomfort and disdain for pregnancy.
Ten Juicy and Personal Pregnancy Questions: 30 Weeks Preggo
Symptoms: Massive heartburn! Just terrible heartburn: wake-you-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-breathing-fire-and-drooling-acid-on-pillowcase-level heartburn. Indigestion that keeps my appetite at bay (I have no cravings as I wasn't an emotional eater to begin with, and now it's simply a miracle to eat a full meal), massively enlarges breasts (up five cup sizes… I mean, really?! They officially no longer make bra's in my 32 inch band with the cup size I need. Ladies with smaller chests, know that you won the genetic lottery), leaky nipples (FUN!), round ligament pain while vigorously exercising, constant achy hips as they widen for birth (see photo below...), waddling, backaches, more backaches and much more heartburn. And now in my third trimester, a return of nausea! You know, because we just missed each other so much.
Exercise: Hell yes! Five to seven times/week. This is the ONLY thing keeping me sane at this point in my life. I’m doing a mix of yoga (regular vinyasa flow with modifications, not actual prenatal classes), ballet barre classes, power walking in the beautiful Dallas spring weather, and circuit training/weight lifting classes. I did Insanity training through 25 weeks, but those days are now on hold until baby boy gets served his eviction notice from my body in early June. Due to the shape I was in before getting pregnant, I’ve been able to keep up with just about everything, and I’m SO unbelievably thankful for that!
New this week: We attended our first birth class this past weekend! Our midwives ask all mothers and husbands to participate in The Bradly Method to learn the ins and outs to natural births. This is an EIGHT WEEK class. I feel like I could be a certified midwife after this…
What I'm missing: Hardcore interval training – I'm talking music TURNT UP and balls-to-the-f*$&ing-walling it exercise. My reduced lung capacity and massive, "straight out" baby bump don’t remotely allow for this. I miss the endorphins you feel after such a workout; running sprints and 8-10 mile runs; sushi; beer and wine; walking up a flight of stairs without becoming entirely breathless; non-maternity jeans (why do women like maternity jeans?! They slip down your bum and don’t you miss buttoning your pants like a normal adult?! Also, the belly on these things is so friggin itchy, and it’s only getting worse as Texas heats up. I’m a big NO on maternity jeans, but I know I’m in the minority on that one).
Wedding Rings On/Off: On – I’ve been so lucky to have zero swelling anywhere. Heyoooo, a pregnancy symptom I don’t actually suffer from, there’s a change! Wootwoot!
Belly button in/out: Out – but only ¾ out! The bottom hasn’t fully popped yet. It’s been this way since about 21 weeks. Lean muscular tummy + growing baby = instabellybuttonpoppage
Dr. visit: We went to our midwives at 27 weeks (last monthly appointment – we’ll begin the every two week visits this month!) and he was measuring at almost 29 weeks, so he’s sizing two weeks ahead of schedule. He had been sizing a week behind my official due date, but I started to take an iron supplement for pregnancy-induced anemia (that's a REAL treat, let me tell you), and he’s done quite well for himself with all the necessary iron. My blood pressure was great and my heartbeat was 52 while his was 148, I DON’T have gestational diabetes, and I was given a high-five for my healthy eating as demonstrated by my food log. Bam! Take THAT to yo face, preggo symptoms!
My mood: So, sans-baby, I’m the least emotional woman you have or haven’t met. With this little bugger, I don’t think I’ve made it through one movie without crying. In fact, I even cried in the most recent Hunger Games movie. (When JLaw was screaming after Prim?! Y'all. Seriously!)
Weight gain: 17 lbs. I’m going to try to make it to the 25 pound mark for total weight gain, so we'll see if I can get there. (25 pounds is the minimum standard recommendation for women who started their pregnancies off at a healthy BMI in traditional American medicine.) I’ve found that I need to eat - at every meal - to the point of being UNCOMFORTABLY full to gain just one pound in a week.
I’m trying, but I also believe that your body will do what it needs to do if you're smart enough to listen to it. As long as baby boy is healthy and my midwives aren’t concerned, then to hell with conventional weight gain amounts. My midwives don’t hand out a “target number” like OBGYN's do, but instead want their women to focus on her and baby’s health, and that’s exactly what I’m doing with my diet. You’ll find zero processed/fast foods (you could not PAY ME to eat McDonalds) and minimal sugar consumption in my diet (no cakes, cupcakes or cookie binge eating here), so I guess I’m not surprised that my weight gain has been lowwwww and slowwwww. Kinda like Southern BBQ, which went down pretty good last week. Mmmm, pulled pork...
Stretch marks: NONE! And seriously hoping it stays that way. I hear that if you haven’t developed them by around 25 weeks, you’re not likely to develop the “all over the belly red marks” that I was dumb enough to google and develop nightmares over. Also, my mom didn’t get them with her babies; hoping I got handed down those great genes. My weight gain is also minimal, so that’s working in my favor, as is my age (still in my 20’s - ohwhutup collagen, thanks for working for me!) I’m feeling good about this! C’mon skin, we got it, we got it, hang with me for 10 more weeks...