Looking back, this is what I would tell my pre-baby self
Sometimes I think back on what life used to be like, and what I used to think of people with kids before I had them myself and I laugh/shudder. I had some strong opinions on how children should be raised, and knew exactly how I was going to do it and do it right. Hahahaha, ohhhh Paige. Oh dear girl. Here's a letter from me to me with what I would say to my pre-baby self.
|Pre-baby Paige thinking she knows everything... Ha!|
Shut up. No I'm serious, shut up. Listen up. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING.
It's cute that you think you'll breastfeed for over a year, and everything in the house will be nontoxic and organic and it's adorable that you think exposing your child to fruits and veggies early on will result in him loving that food for his whole life.
Here's the reality girlfriend: You have no idea how exhausted you're going to get. I'm talking weeks and weeks and months of 5 hours of sleep or less a night, and not consecutive five hours. You have no idea what that does to a person. Sleep deprivation is actually used as a torture device for a reason, and new moms and dads know this well. Moms who give their babies formula so that their partners can help with feedings at night aren't bad moms, they're smart moms. Once you reach the breaking point of sleep deprivation and discover that formula isn't the devil, give yourself a pat on the back.
You are going to try and try and try to get your toddler to eat healthy foods, to develop his taste buds. You'll expose him to everything possible. You'll go out of your way to make him healthy meals that you know he'll love and guess what? He won't eat it. But he'll always eat cheese and crackers and that will drive you MAD. Let it go, sweetheart. Some days, all your picky eater will eat is a container of blueberries. Other days, he'll eat fish and spinach lasagna. You cannot control his taste buds or what he'll eat - he's a toddler, he's crazy. You were wrong when you thought picky eaters were made and not born. Henry will defiantly show you that.
And right as you're about to lose your mind with his pickiness, Otto will come along and happily eat anything you make with gusto. He'll be the reason you cook dinner at all, although he'll make you lose your mind over other things.
As you grow in motherhood, you'll find yourself becoming far less judgmental, especially of other moms. Right now, you sneer at moms with screaming toddlers and of course think she's handling it wrong. But the truth is, YOU'RE wrong. She's handling it the best way she can on as little sleep as she has, pulling together every last ounce of sanity she possibly has to get through that shopping trip. In time, you'll learn this.
I know you think you know what being tired is like right now, but trust me - you don't. So enjoy sleeping through the night now, because even after your kids start sleeping through the night, you'll get up. You'll still wake at the times you used to nurse Otto and bottle feed Henry. Henry's nearly three and you're still waking up several times a night, so sleep now princess, sleep now.
That all sounds kinda like a bunch of bad news, so I'll end on a positive note for you, child-free Paigey. You'll get your body back after popping out babies. It will be a different body, some things won't ever "come back" but you'll be in shape. The gym will be you're break. Funny huh? Right now it's another thing to do after work, but after kids, it will be your break in the day. You'll go even when you're sick because a barre class is less work than running after two kids. Imagine that!
Oh Paige, you have lots of ideas about what having kids will be like, and most of them - if not all of them - are wrong. But you'll figure it out, and through motherhood, you'll become a better person.
|Post baby Paige who's wiser and kinder|