An Uncomplicated Life Blog: BIG News! The Shock Of A Lifetime

Thursday, May 3, 2018

BIG News! The Shock Of A Lifetime

Yes, this is what you think it is. Surprise! We're having TWINS


Believe me when I tell you that nobody was more surprised than I was to find out... We're expecting TWINS! Naturally conceived fraternal twins. Odds of that happening are 12 in 1000. Hubs and I were on board for ONE more baby, then calling it a day with family planning. Looks like we accidentally bought the two-for-one special and will be cashing in that coupon this fall. Here's a bit more on what it's like finding out you're having surprise twins, from a mom who already knows what having an infant is like.

The baby announcement winner!

We had been trying for a few months for our third baby. I'm not one to take a pregnancy test early, so I took it when I was a few days late. It popped up positive right away! Of course, Otto and Henry were with me (mom's never pee alone...) and they both saw it and I told them there was a baby inside mommy. Both Henry and Otto immediately wanted baby's inside them, too. It was presh.

The first two weeks were great. So great, I actually understood why some women like being pregnant. I was sleeping like a baby, my skin looked great because I wasn't drinking alcohol, my clothes still fit and I was rocking my yoga classes. Then seven weeks hit, and I started to have more nausea and lower energy. Then eight week hit and I was ALWAYS exhausted, felt like I had been kicked in the head by a horse, nauseous and vomiting and my boobs were ON FIRE. This wasn't my first pregnancy, so I was a little curious about why my boobs hurt so much. Typically, they're the most affected in your first pregnancy, then it's not as noticeable for every pregnancy after that. 

It was so weird, I googled "odds of having twins" and "risk factors for twins." The only ones I had were that I'm Caucasian (white and black ladies have the highest rates of twins) and I'm tall (they're more common in tall people, I guess.) I'm not over 35, I'm not obese or even remotely close to overweight, and I knew of nobody in either of our families who had natural twins.

At 8.5 weeks I had my first appointment. Typical stuff - questions, exam, pregnancy test. I'm high risk because Henry was preterm, and I've always had a dating sonogram at my first appointment.  I asked my midwife (they're the ones that do pregnancy confirmation appointments at my OB's office) if I was getting a sono, and she said I wasn't scheduled for one, but that my OB happened to be in the office that day, so she'd ask her if she could fit me in. My OB said sure, we'll take a peek real quick! I waited 45 minutes and then went in for the sono.

An outtake. It was the WINDIEST DAY and Otto was scared of the big balloons flying in his face!

I saw it before she even said anything. Since this aint my first rodeo, I know what I'm looking at when it comes to ultrasounds. For a second, my brain let me think, "no no no, she just slid over the same baby twice as she maneuvered the ultrasound wand to get a better look! That was the same baby I saw twice." Then I looked from the sono screen to my OB's face. Oh no. That was indeed two. She and I both saw it and knew it.

"Gurrrrrrlllll, you are having twins!!" She said.

She made sure they were both in their own sacs and had their own placentas (they do, and that means they're fraternal) and low and behold, they were measuring AHEAD of my dates. Baby A had a heartbeat in the high 150's and Baby B in the high 160's (I'd tell you the exact number if I could remember... I was honestly blacking out from the shock of twins). "I'm going to have to get a good shot of both babies, otherwise your husband won't believe you!" she said to me.

I couldn't even feel my toes as I made my next prenatal appointment. The receptionist asked me if I was ok. "Nope. I just found out I'm having twins." "Oh lawwwwd, you bout to be busy!" she replied. 

I made it to my car before I burst into tears and completely. lost. my. $hit. Who do you call when you're losing your $hit? Your mom. I'm 33 years old and when things get hard my first call is STILL always to my mama and somehow my mom always answers when I'm desperate. Even if she's at work or overseas or it's 2am. (It's like we were connected at some point or something ;)) "MOM!!" I gasped between sobs. She knew I had my first appointment that day, and was expecting a call from me sometime. "Oh God, what's wrong?" She thought I had lost the baby. "I'm having TWINNNNSSSS!" 

"Oh my God! You poor thing!" she replied. I was so thankful my mom got it. Had I heard an immediate happy response and some horse$hit about "double the blessing" I'd have gone absolutely postal. "Don't worry honey, we'll figure this out! It's going to be ok." She told me.

My husband? Yeah, my OB was right. He didn't believe me until I showed him the picture. He really thought I was trying to play a big old joke on him!

In the following weeks that rounded out my first trimester, I told my closest friends (most of whom are moms themselves), my nanny, and some random people at the grocery store I frequent. ALL of them, thankfully, had the right response. "Holy $hit, I'm FREAKING OUT for you! You are so screwed! Oh. my. god. Ahhhhh how could this have happened?!"

Guys. That right there is the RIGHT response. That response tells me you know EXACTLY how hard motherhood is, EXACTLY how much work a singleton newborn is, EXACTLY how hard being 9 months pregnant with one baby is and EXACTLY how terrifying having twins really is... In addition to already having two toddlers at home. I do not want to hear anything about "blessings" or "double the fun" - that's for people who have their heads up their a$$es and live in a dream world. I don't like fake people who don't join me in reality. 

I don't know why my card was drawn for natural twins, but it was. It was not, in anyway shape or form, remotely close to what I ever wanted. Ever. But, it's what's happening. So I can either be a buzzkill about it or get on board with it! I'm setting my expectations extremely low in hopes that reality beats them, and it doesn't turn out *quite* as bad as I'm imagining life with twins to be.

Otto got his number right in this shot, Henry was choking himself and my hair was horrifically windblown. Awesome.

To end on the bright side, since my first two are only 19 months apart, we already have two cribs and a fancy double stroller. I upgraded to a three row SUV exactly a year ago, and everyone will fit in the car. We have a large enough house to still ahve a guest room. And thank the Good Lord and Baby Jesus, we're well enough off that I can hire some additional help for those first trying, challenging months. I've already got a night nurse lined up for a new nights a week! 

Emotionally speaking, I knew my husband wanted to be done at baby three and make that a permanent decision. I wasn't even willing to entertain that conversation. I thought, let's just have this third baby and see how our family feels... He was pretty stern on being done. That didn't sit well with me. Now that I know there's two, I can tell you that these twins will absolutely complete our family, and that hubs and I are on the same page for family planning! Potential disagreement avoided. I was also not big on an odd number, thinking this baby would be left out because Otto and Henry are such good friends. Don't need to worry about that now, everyone has a playmate!

I'm still getting over the shock of our big news. I'm still trying to get excited about the thought of having two infants at once. How will I breastfeed TWO?! How will I baby wear TWO?! Will I ever sleep again?! I don't have enough hands for this! I could go on and on... But, it's happening. Before I had kids, I always thought I'd have four of them. After I had one and realized how much work they are, I thought, yeah, two or three would be great, more than that is a hard pass! Well, looks like prebaby Paige was right about some things, because four kiddos (age 4 and under no less!) it will be. What a shock of a lifetime guys.

25 comments:

  1. OH MY FREAKING GOD!! I'm shocked, I was not expecting this Paige. Scary as $hit, yes, but I'm happy for ya. ;) xoxo

    ReplyDelete
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  2. I still can’t believe it, but I totally called it the week before your appointment. Remember? Sounds like you’re not the only semi-clairvoyant one. 😉

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lady I am freaking out for you too. Excited but in that glad its not me way... Like your mom said you will figure it out. And now I cannot wait to see how this goes, because I know you will be as blunt as ever and girl I love it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I just had fraternal twins! We have one toddler and were planning to be done at 2 kids. Then the universe laughed and sent us twins. I had a very similar reaction to you with a lot more swearing because I also had no twins in the family and am under 35. As someone with other kids, you will be able to do this. Having twins is hard but because you are not a first time mom you will know what to do. You got this!

    ReplyDelete
  5. LOL! First of all these pictures are hilarious especially Otto's face expression.

    Second of all, I wanted to so bad say something on your Facebook post that you were F***ed but I kept it to myself because I didn't know how you would take it lol. I would have seriously died from a heart attack. I would've told my "husband" he is getting fixed because damn that's 4 kids you have to watch. Thankfully you have some help from family and a nanny. But oh weeeee I am going to drink for you girl.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Holy cow! That is insane! Those pictures, love that you posted the outtakes. Congrats and can't wait to watch the journey of your growing family.

    ReplyDelete
  7. That is a HUGE shock! And yes, as much as babies are blessings, newborns are WORK and twins are quadruple the work (because somehow mathematically it works out that way I'm sure). You all WILL figure it out, even though it will be an adjustment.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I think we’re all still in shock. I’m so glad you’ll have help though. It’s going to be a crazy first year when they get here. And I hope Kirk made his appointment with the snip snip doc already. 😉

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am so happy for your family! Yes, there will be crazy, manic, incredibly tireless nights. You guys are pros now raising two toddlers! You got this! You are very blessed! The boys will be older and will be more helpful with the babies! We are elated for you and Kirk! Paige, you’ve got a double glow and it looks amazing❣️

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh my goodness! Congratulations on your pregnancy. Just take these twins one day, hour, minute, second at a time! xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  11. What a rollercoaster! Can’t wait to be a fly on the wall of the wild ride. Congrats girl!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Can I just say I LOVE how honest you were in this post, since I totally would feel the same way!! Yes, double the blessing.. but it takes a minute for it to sink it I bet!! It was really refreshing to read this and I am wishing you a healthy pregnancy and you will totally rock being a twin mom!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. My sister in law just had natural fraternal twins too. Right now they still look a lot alike. One is certainly more naturally agressive than the other and she's a little chub too. Hope everything goes well for you!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh my goodness, congratulations! That's wonderful news! What an exciting adventure for your family!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Love your honest reaction! As exciting as it is, it must be incredibly nerve wracking. I am so glad that you have a baby nurse lined up! My best friend who has twin boys, and whose husband is a doctor, said it was the thing that saved her. Unless you have a husband who is going to wake up and help you in the middle of the night with twins, you need some help! You got this Paige! Can't wait to see their gender reveal!

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