Planning For Home Improvements

Use this tool to help you plan your home improvements

Last fall, we completely gutted our master bath. We literally took the room down to the studs and started over fresh with a completely new bathroom! Our house was built in 1979 and it was the only room that had yet to have any serious renovations done. The previous owners had done some cosmetic updates, like new fixtures and fresh paint, but at the end of the day, it was still a 1979 bathroom that needed a sledgehammer in the worst way. So we decided to bite the bullet by hiring a contractor, getting a few bids, and the next thing we knew a few guys came in with those sledgehammers! I learned a few lessons (some of them the hard way) and learned that the PLANNING of your home improvements is just as important as the implementation of those improvements.

What were some of those lessons? The biggest one (or two, really) was expect it to take longer and cost more than what your bid states. Contractors know what they're doing, but they can't see and know everything about your home until they're already working on it. Expect for unplanned expenses and delays in work - just build them into your budget and timeline in advance!

For our timeline, we were quoted two months. We live in Dallas, which currently has one of the hottest housing markets in the country because of the stellar job economy here. Not only that, but our neighborhood in particular is in the national top 10 for explosive growth. We bought right at the beginning of the growth curve, so we're loving what we're seeing for home sales! That means our home equity is increasing. We increased it further by renovating the last room in the house that needed improvements!

The bummer about all the growth meant that contractors are BUSY. Our timeline got blown out of the water quickly. I had ordered custom vanities that should have taken six weeks to build and arrive; but because of all the growth and how busy the builder was, they took almost nine weeks. That threw my contractor off so that he had to rearrange his staff on what projects they were working on. It ended up that the vanities were delivered and sat in for a week because my contractor didn't have capacity to install them. That threw us off by 10 whole weeks! I learned there's an order of operations in construction. Tile has to be laid before vanities can be installed; the vanities have to be installed before the counter tops can be installed; the counter tops have to be there before the under-mount sink can go in; and so on. So when one piece of the puzzle gets thrown off, the whole project is delayed!

Budget was the other big lesson. As in, you need far more of it than you think! I know HGTV tells us we can do a whole master bath for $8,000 but let me tell you: Nope. You can't. That wouldn't have even paid for the labor, let alone materials cost for our bathroom! In fact, I can tell you that my vision for the bathroom was to have a large, free standing soaker tub instead of a drop in. When we were out selecting materials for our renovation, I fell in love with a cast iron soaker. "Ohhhh, babe, that's our tub!" I said. Then I asked our sales associate "how much" and with a grimace, she replied, "That's a really nice tub... It's $10,000, and that doesn't cover delivery." So, that was out real quick!

We paid our renovation in cash, but that's not the reality for most folks. Capital One has this really neat home equity calculator, and also has great rates for home equity loans, which is how most people finance their home improvements. Whether you’re remodeling your home or consolidating debt, Capital One is there to help with simply smarter tools that help you choose the right option for your situation.

Carpet that will eventually be replaced

Now that the master bath is complete, the our next task will be replacing the carpet in the bedrooms. The living, dining and hallways are all hardwood or brick, but there's carpet in the bedrooms that the previous owners installed a few years ago. They put in high quality carpet, but it's beige. And I have two boys. And a dog. And a husband who seems to spill coffee every day. We invested in a Rug Doctor and do spot cleaning every few months, but someday we'll just outright replace the carpet. I'm not sure if we'll do hardwoods or if we'll do different carpet, but I know that I can expect it to take longer than planned and cost more than we though! And if we need financing for our next home improvement, I know I can use the tools from Capital One and get a great rate on a home equity loan.

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of CLEVER and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

Halloween Favorites

The best Halloween has to offer, from movies to decorations to activities

Halloween is my favorite, the same way Will Ferrell's favorite is Christmas in the movie Elf. My absolute favorite. It's only fitting that I share some of my favorite things about this fabulously bizarre holiday, right? Right. Let's jump right in then.

Favorite decorative piece: This skull cookie jar. We got it on our trip to New Orleans, which is one of my favorite cities. Tons of fun voodoo shops and haunted history there, so that's no wonder, right? I don't actually put cookies in it because I don't want any grubby toddler hands breaking this little gem.

Favorite scary movie: The Conjuring. Y'all, don't watch this one alone! I had some bad dreams after this movie, no joke. The Conjuring 2, however, is pretty lame so either don't get your hopes up when you watch it or go head and skip it all together. The Ring is a close second. I think I was in high school when that one came out and I didn't sleep for about a week thinking that distorted shapes were coming out of my closet, about to manifest into a ghost or demon.

Favorite bad scary movie: Cabin Fever. You know movies that are SO bad, they're actually amazing? Like you're sitting on your couch in awe that the film got production funding - that bad? Well Cabin Fever takes the cake in this category, hands down! Everything about it is fantastically awful; the acting is horrific, the plot sucks, the gore is so fake I think they used watered down katchup for blood. It's so bad, it's amazing. And hysterical.

Favorite costume idea: So here's the thing - I'm TERRIBLE at costumes. No really. You'd think that for a woman who loves Halloween, she'd be the most clever at figuring out costumes, right? Nope, I suck at it! I usually go as a witch, which as you can see from this throwback (photo of a photo, sorry digital didn't exist in 1990 when this was taken) is a perennial fave of mine. You're welcome for this pic.

Just Witch/Zombie twinning with my sister

With the kids, I let them choose their costumes. Henry went as a ninja turtle last year (which ever one the purple one is - he definitely chose that costume because his favorite color is purple. I think it's his favorite word, too. He says it 100+ times a day) and he's going as that again this year, because hey! That thing was $40 and it still fits and he still loves purple. Otto will be a pumpkin, because Target had that costume in his size. Told ya I suck at this costume business.

Our little Ninja Turtle last year *heart eyes emjoi*

Favorite Halloween activity: Decorating the house. And doing a new decor craft like these pumpkins every year. I LOVE holiday decorating and actually get sad when it all comes down because the house looks so bare! It's fun to open the storage boxes and think, "Oh hey! I forgot I had this!" or "Oh wow, totally forgot I bought that on super sale last year!"

Carving pumpkins and trick or treating are actually on the bottom of my list: My skin is allergic to pumpkin so carving is kinda a bummer (hives like whoa) and trick or treating is cute for a block with the kids... But the issue is that in Texas, people don't seem to understand that you only ring the doorbell of the homes with their porch lights on. Our kids go to bed at 7pm. And a-hole kids STILL ring the bell (and make the dog bark) well past 9pm, when not only do we have the porch light off, we've turned off all decorations and made the front of the house dark too. So rude! I sound old and crotchety.

Halloween is fun because it's laid back, there's no stress with hosting family for a large meal unlike Thanksgiving and Christmas, the weather has cooled down and there's treats. What's not to love? These are a few of my favorites for this fun holiday. Happy Halloween!

When You're The Friend Who Leaves

On the challenges of friendship when you move away

I've packed up all my crap and moved across this country three times. Once for grad school. Then again for a job. Then again for my husband's job. I actually find it quite exciting to head to a new city, and hope I have the chance to do it again at some point. What's NOT exciting is the toll it takes on your friendships. I was having a text convo with my roommate from grad school, as she's also moved all over the country with a military husband. We were talking about a shared experience with some of our high school friends when I got the idea for this post. This, guys, is what it's like when you're the friend who leaves by moving away.

Also, I hope you enjoy the party pics of me and some of my "forever" friends. I dug deep into the bowels of Facebook to find these old pics, just for your enjoyment. Back to the topic at hand:

At first, it's exciting. You need to figure out where the grocery store is, and where Target is, and you're trying to find your favorite local restaurants. And while that's exciting, the early months are also the loneliest. You haven't made new friends yet - if you're lucky, you've just met some new acquaintances. So you rely heavily on your friends from your former city. But it's bittersweet to talk to them. They fill the conversation with tales from your former favorite restaurants and bars, the kickball league you used to play on, and give you the gossip on your former favorite yoga teacher. In those first few months of living in a new city, you depend heavily on your old friends. But oddly, sometimes talking to them makes you sad. They only remind you of everything you loved and how badly you miss it.

Pre-kids, when I could fly to Richmond several times a year to party with these beauties. This is 2010. Red-faced drunk guy totally photobombed this otherwise cute pic.

After you've been gone for several months, you've made new friends. You have people to go to lunch with and you have people to hang out with on the weekends. But they don't know you like your old friends do. You're finally no longer homesick, at least not all the time, but every once in a while you think, "Dang! I wish (fill in the name of your closest friend from your former city) was here! They'd totally understand why I'm laughing/crying!" And then you call up that friend, and have a good long talk about it, and feel refreshed that there are people in the world that still truly "know" and "get" you.

Then you decide, you know what! I'm going to go back to that city and pay everyone a visit. So you get your ticket and let all your old crew know you're coming. You start to get activities and dates set up to hang out with as many people as possible. But you're also shocked at who DOESN'T respond to you, nor make time to see you. You're left a little miffed, thinking, "hey, I'm traveling 1100 miles to see you! Why can't you clear a night to hang out with me?" You'll be shocked at who won't drive to your side of town when you've traveled so far. You'll be saddened by who decides to leave town on the very dates you're traveling there so that they can take a last minute trip with their new boy/girlfriend. You'll also be happy with the friends that go out of their way to see you and make your trip worth it.

2008: The year I thought it'd be fun to be a brunette (it wasn't), lived in Savannah and told Paula Deen I wanted to marry one of her sons. That didn't pan out, but I'm still friends with the gal in the photo!

As you put more and more time in between the date that you left your last city and all your friends, the calls and texts get fewer and fewer. You start to submerge yourself in your new city and life and friends more and more. Perhaps now when you need some advice or want to have an in-depth conversation, you even call one of your "new" friends because you called one of your old ones, but got their voicemail for the third time.

There are friends who will be your "forever" friends. With the friends who do stick around, every time you talk it's as though you never left. You're able to jump right back in to your regular ways and conversation and it feels so good! Then there are the friends who will let the distance sever the friendship. There are friends who will put in the time and effort to remain connected and those that won't. And who is who and which is which will likely bring some surprises.

Been friends with this guy for almost 20 years! This was NYE 2009. Just look at those false lashes!

Being the friend who leaves is both the exciting role (whoohoo, a new city and new experiences!) and also the lonely and frustrating role. You want so desperately to continue friendships, but sometimes that's hard. At first, it just makes you more lonely and then after some time, it just becomes challenging. Lives change and move forward. You make new friends. Your best friends will always be in the picture, even if you don't talk to them regularly or see them often. But who truly ARE your best friends might shock you when you're the friend who leaves for a new city.