An Uncomplicated Life Blog: Social Media Overkill

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Social Media Overkill

We all get it. Social media is a massive part of blogging - perhaps THE most massive. It's big to small businesses as it's the "free" way to promote your brand. It's big to everyone. It's 24/7.

It's 2015; this is not news to anyone.

I'm not even talking about the standard Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest either - now there's Snapchat and Periscope and God knows what else to keep you glued to your phone to stay "up to date with what's happening!"

Paying more attention to #socialmedia than what's REALLY happening in life


On Sunday, hubs was futzing around the house or the yard or where/whatever he was doing, and Henry and I were in the play room. I was sitting on the floor with my iPhone, "staying up to date with what's happening!" with my real friends and my blogging friends. Henry was getting fussy and I was getting annoyed with him.

"Dang kid, you have a room full of blocks and firetrucks and Minions! Find something to entertain yourself with!" I thought. He continued to get louder and louder.

Finally, I put my phone down and looked at him, completely annoyed. Doesn't he know mommy has to stay engaged to remain relevant on social media?!

Henry stopped fussing immediately, flashed me a big smile and handed me a piece of a puzzle. He wasn't hungry or thirsty and his diaper wasn't wet. He just wanted me to look at him instead of my phone. He just wanted his mom to pay attention and play with him.

There have been numerous articles on how destructive social media is to our personal relationships, especially romantic ones. Recently, I've read several articles on how there's a new generation of children who are developing behavior problems because they're competing for their parents attention with PHONES. I remember reading that and thinking, "Psshhhh! Those parents suck!"

And then I realized I WAS that parent.

Are you spending too much time on #socialmedia and not watching your kids?
"Just ripping the child safety foam off the fireplace ledge mama, nothing to see here. Get back to your phone."

I had a serious wake up call this weekend. Yes, my Twitter and Instagram have exploded and I'm trying to figure out how to be successful at this thing called Periscope. And in the process, I'm ignoring my son. He's playing by himself while his mom is glued to a f#*&!^g screen. I'm not staying "up to date with what's happening!' No. I'm missing EVERYTHING.

Perhaps if you're not married or don't have children you can successfully live your life through a screen. Perhaps it's the very reason you aren't married and don't have kids. I hit my social media overkill point this weekend when I realized I'd rather live my REAL life in REAL time. Screens don't capture snuggles from my little boy or kicks from my baby-in-utero. They don't capture back rubs from my husband or licks from my dogs.


I'm glad I got this wake up call and have since put my phone down to take in my real life. Are you still living through a screen?

94 comments:

  1. Great post. I have to make sure I disconnect pretty frequently too. It's harder and harder to do nowadays.

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  2. As bloggers, it is part of our job to stay so connected to social media! That's how we get our material out there, and it's important to make connections with others. But at the same time, you're right, we need to set a designated time to simply disconnect.

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  3. I struggle with this at times, as well. I find that when I start to get grouchy with my kids because they want to see my face, not the back of my head, then it's time to put my phone away. And I mean put it away...I stick it in my bra drawer so it's totally out of sight and reach. :) I try to do most of my social media stuff...read blogs, write blog posts, schedule FB posts and look at IG between 6:30 and 8, which is when the boys are just getting up and still watching TV. I do get sucked in during the day, but I'm a work in progress! :)

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  4. I'm right there with you! My kids, especially my daughter, gets frustrated when I don't watch whatever she's trying to show me, with all of my attention. Kids are good at reminding us of the things that really matter the most in life! Great post!!

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  5. I so agree with this - we were at dinner the other night and I looked over and saw a family of four in which every member was on their phones. The whole meal. They didn't talk to each other at all. That is why when I have kids I am going to keep my parents rule as it still stands when we go to Sunday dinner now. No phones at the dinner table. No phones during family night/time.

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  6. This is a really great post, Paige!
    I've struggled with this too. For a while we had a "no phone in bed" rule and I kind of messed that up... I need to reinstate it. I think it's an addiction, to be honest. I think it's an addiction for MOST people.

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  7. Really great post girl!! I make it a point to shut my phone off at night around 9:30 it's not that early, but I just want to unwind with Gary and talk and just be the two of us. We also have a no phones at dinner rule! :) xo, biana -BlovedBoston

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  8. It's the main reason I stopped blogging. I found myself on my phone/computer all the time and not enjoying being the moment. It took away from my relationships and I was constantly looking for good Instagram shots and it was all just crazy. I hate that aspect of blogging but I get that it's a necessity to grow. I think we just need to find a balance that works for us. I also worry that all the selfies are making our generation more egocentric and like you said there are some fascinating studies about the impacts it's having on kids. Great post!! Certainly got me thinking this morning :)

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  9. Wait....what's periscope?

    Anyways....this is such a great post Paige. It is the straight truth. I have tried to implement in the house a one screen only rule. If the tv is on, no computers or iPhones etc etc. I'm like I don't even see you during the day, hello be engaged and talk for once instead of scrolling through Facebook to see ridiculous life updates that are't that exciting or relevant to your life. That last picture I died, don't mind me just man handling this child safety protector, its got nothing on me.

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  10. love this post Paige, so true. I don't have kids, obviously, but KC and I don't look at our phones when we eat or watch a movie or whatever together.. or when we're in the car.. basically, if we are 'doing' something together, no phones allowed. sometimes no laptops too. i'm lucky that KC isn't like addicted to his phone like some other men i know, so it helps me put mine down. i really try and be present when i am around people, and i hope i am the same when i have kids. it's so disheartening when you're out to dinner or something with people and you look up to start a conversation and.. everyone is on their phone. I do not like it at all!

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  11. I can totally relate to this post. I've considered stopping blogging just because of the amount of time I have to spend on my computer and phone. Finding a balance can be really hard, but when in doubt, always spend more time in the real world. You're not alone in this problem. Not at all!

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  12. My two year old knows how to put my computer into sleep mode and when he decides I've been on too long he comes and puts my computer to sleep. Then I don't open my computer until dad is home or little guy is in bed. I am a new blogger and am trying to get more followers but not at the expense of my family. Thanks for sharing your experience.

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  13. Gosh yes! I don't have a kid yet, but over the last few months I really took a step back from blogging & phone time both. It's just too much. I want to enjoy life and all the moments going on around me :)

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  14. I'm sort of in the same boat as Ursula. I've thought about quitting blogging ton of times because it's SO time consuming, even if you don't have a huge following and when you add in social media. It's crazy. I hate being on my phone all the time. It feels like a cycle we all perpetuate by being connected all the time and then not wanting to miss out.

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  15. Awesome post... It does get to be a lot and overwhelming at times...Sometimes it's good to disconnect and connect with family. It's all about memories....Thanks for sharing.

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  16. I've been feeling a little overwhelmed by social media lately. I love/hate it. I recently did a big Instagram clean out and it has helped some. I also try to have one day a week where I'm not on it at all, but that doesn't always happen... =(

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  17. Wow, this made me think! I spend a lot of time on my phone since I do a lot of blog stuff with it, too. It's so good to take a break at least for a bit each day to just unplug and focus on what is in front of you.

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  18. My husband has commented numerous times, probably more than I'd like to admit. Everyone needs to put the phone down more, it's fkn insane. We're all guilty of it!!! I try to read blogs/comment/respond to emails and all that biz while I'm commuting back and forth to work (2 hours a day) and wait for it, even two hours a day isn't enough to keep up.

    North Americans in particular don't know when to stop or slow down, it's really sad and I see it especially when I'm away in another country, slowed down to their pace.

    Thanks for the reminder to get the F off the phone sometime!!!

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  19. Social media has become just another part of our lives these days. I think it has a lot of benefits especially with keeping up with family far away and blogging peeps, but yeah it can be so easy to get too invested in it all. Haha I realize how ironic it is that I'm saying that online. By the way you had the cutest wake-up call ever, a lot better than those people that are texting and walking into poles haha. Oh, not to sound completely unaware, but what's Periscope? I see everyone talking about it!

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  20. This is a great post. I've been thinking about this a lot lately too. I deleted the twitter and facebook apps from my phone and that really helped!

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  21. This is such a great reminder that we all need to spend more time living in the moment!!! I am guilty of checking my phone too often, but I also trying to balance my blogging life by not engaging as much on social media as some. I check my Instagram and Twitter a few times each day....but I am rarely engaged past that. It just gets to be so overwhelming at times! Sure, I may not be a "big blogger" because of it..but I am completely fine with that!

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  22. Hi! I am Pamela from over at A Little Glitter. Kristen shared your post during the Share the Love Link-Up I am hosting today! It is nice to e-meet you. This subject definitely hits close to home because I have a ten year old daughter and not only do I get glued to my screen SHE recently (for her birthday last month) was allowed to start an Instagram account and she gets glued to her iPad. I think it is SO important to keep boundaries in place and have quality time together without electronics. We eat dinner together every night at the table with no electronics and also I have a time limit for her iPad (even on weekends) to ensure she doesn't spend all day on it. I totally relate to what you are saying. Especially as a blogger sometimes social media feels like "work" so you are excused, even though you are sitting there with your phone in your face being rude. I have been trying to be more aware of myself lately and the example I set for her but it is definitely hard.

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  23. Fantastic post! Frequently, I admit that I will never be a big deal in the internet world of ours. I just learned yet another reason why...I don't even know what Periscope is. Ha! I have a 7 year old stepson, and if he isn't watching tv, he's playing his x-box, and if he's not doing that he's asking if he can watch minecraft videos on youtube, and if he isn't doing that, he's asking if he can play games on our phones. We've done some heavy examining of how to set time limits of when he can use any/all electronic devices.

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